Old Friends Becoming New

Friendships as adults are weird. Making friends as an adult is even weirder. Because becoming friends as kids was as simple as being in the same class, liking the same shows, listening to the same music. And these markers of friendship grew and adapted alongside each other as you grew up into the fully formed adult-type person you are today. These friendship starters can still be used to make friends as an adult, but it's much harder. You stand in front of these other people who all seem to have their shit together, as a fully formed person and say 'here I am. Take it or leave it" which is a weird and scary thing. 

Sometimes you're going to succeed with these friendships and you're going to get to change (albeit slower) into an entirely different adult alongside them. Other times you're going to crash hard and burn even harder. You put your faith in the wrong person, and suddenly all those adult friends you have are nowhere to be found. 

But then like a shining light, one of those friends from way back. One of the ones that time and distance (before social media), just slipped away. Not because of any one thing, there was never a moment that made you stop being friends, you just kind of drifted. One of those friends is suddenly standing right in front of you again.

Take the chance. Reconnect.
Trust me, it's worth it.

For the past few weeks I've been doing just that, an old friend (and if she's reading this. I hope she knows exactly who she is) and I have been reconnecting. And it's been great. We've reminisced about old times, all the terrible choices we made together (boys mostly), and every second has been worth it. Every moment has been fun. 

So my advice to you out there. If you have that friend that you can't really pinpoint why you stopped being friends. That one that there really is no reason, for us it was I moved for school and she stayed home. Before all the social media and when no one really had a cell phone, it was so easy to lose touch. If you can't remember the reason and you've been thinking about them, or you run into them somewhere. Reach out.  Exchange numbers. Go get a coffee. Get to know each other again. 

You never know, everything may just slot back into place. You may find yourselves gossiping like tenth graders again, in between cuddling with babies and deescalating temper tantrums, 'cause hey we have kids now. And that makes everything different, but at the core it all stays the same. 

I know this isn't always the case with old friends. Trust me I know all to well. But usually the ones that aren't worth your time anymore, you know it. You remember the reason. you remember the explosion, and the afterburn. At least I do. There are lots of people from my past who definitely need to stay right where they are, in the past. But there's a couple, a good few who could definitely step front row centre again.